Years ago, during a real estate convention, I heard the incredible Tim Sanders speak about goals, being cooperative and always giving everything you can. It lead me to start following him and reading his books. I was intrigued to find someone with the same values as me that had experienced so much success. The first book I read, Love Is The Killer App confirmed that it’s really okay, even better, to be what he endearingly calls a Lovecat. There’s been times I’ve been told I’m too nice to succeed—which was a shock to hear. If I have to choose values over money, values win every single time.

Lovecat vs. Tyrant

As a managing broker of a small, but busy, real estate office, much of my job is advising the agents on working through their transactions. Trust me, when it’s the biggest transaction of a person’s life, there can be issues on top of emotions on top of issues. Most days, you’ll find me at my desk or hovering over an agent’s computer reading an email that usually trails a phone conversation about details. Why am I taking the time to do this? Well, when you’re conveying a difficult message, it’s easy to talk on the phone and in person and hear voice inflections of the other party and read when they’re concerned about something. You keep your voice calm and pause as needed to help manage and diffuse. However, there are times when messages have to be delivered or re-stated via email, so all parties can understand the same message. This takes tact. I love that the agents trust me to help them with these delicate messages. My personal “Lovecat” advice phrase is: You’ll need to add some sugar. 

I completely believe that the tone of an email or text can break deals, just as it can break relationships in your every day life. I receive an average of 75+ emails a day. Rarely does anyone take the time to stop and consider how the person on the other end of the web will feel when they read an email. How can I tell? There’s just no personal touch. There’s no sugar. There’s no please’s or thank you’s. Simple directives can come across as demands. Lighthearted jokes can offend. Short, quick responses can come off as cold.

Whether my agents are emailing a cooperating agent or one of their customers/clients, the importance of finding the right words remains. Reputation is of utmost importance in the service industry. Some well placed SUGAR goes a long way.